I was excited to realize today that our adoption trip is over in some ways. Because our children are now home there is no real reason to blog under adoptions anymore! 🙂
We have engaged with a lawyer in our state and have begun the process of domestic adoption – while the costs are not done yet, I was happy to find out that we are looking at a couple thousand additional in comparison to the over twenty thousand that has been part of our international adoption so far. We are still waiting to hear from our previous lawyer -he has offered to get our original documents back out of IBESR – as they are the easiest way to proceede – not hearing from him in over a week, we are not sure what to expect.
Christella is settling in very well – with the children as if she has been here her entire life – and I am amazed at home much English she knows! With myself she has really opened up to me the last couple days, wanting to sit with me, and talk with me (altough still hesitant). There is still te battle of the will that happens with any 5 year old – and some friends and family want to give in to the battle – so that has been a bit of a struggle – but one that will pass.
JJ has been the challenge. We thought Christella might have the hard time adjusting – but JJ seems to be experiencing the effects of both bad health and trauma.
He has not yet obtained a nomal bowel movement – and they are very very messy and very very smelly – no foods seem to be bringing relief to us or him – at least his ears are healing.
The emotional side is something else. He is needy – no other way to describe it. For the most part he is constantly crying for attention – he needs to be held and touched and reaffirmed non-stop. He is getting better – but it is very trying, and the first week was almost unbearable!
When he is not crying he is hugging my or amandas leg – as seen In this snapshot while I was blogging. He is starting to get down and play though – which is a good sign – but there is clear and obvious signs of the trauma of the earth quake – as he was never like this at anytime that we visited him last year.
I am confident that he will eventually work it out with a lot of love and patience – right now he just needs to know that we are here for him.
On the other front – Our oldest has finally been officially diagnosed with ADHD, as well as anxiety issues and some obsessive compulsive behavior – guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree although we already knew – but great to have it understood. For the ADHD we can now look to medical help – as it has been shown to be the most effective – for the other two being informed parents will help a lot. The doctor provided us with books to read which can help us better understand how to work with hm.
Once we complete Braedens evaluation, with Donovan, Braeden and I all having our ADHD being addressed – I think the level of chaos will finally start to come down in our home – something I am looking forward to! I feel so bad that the medical field did not know about ADHD growing up – I think my parents could have had a much better life.
Anyway this is the first chance I have had to blog since we came home – sleep is starting to come back to normal for our house too.
We still have a lot to learn and adjust too – and I now understand why the screening for adoption is so extensive 😉