over the last two weeks, I have been on vacation. Over the last two weeks, I have been too sick to do much outside of the house. One thing, however, we have done, is we have watched the Star Wars movies from beginning to end (most of my children and myself). I have always wanted to do that – but have never really had the time.
It was a great opportunity to spend a little quiet time with my children, for the oldest, it also provided some prompts for him to ask some of those more basic questions of life.
I haven’t watched Star Wars in a long, long time; and for one, I am so glad that the first three were made, as they provide so much important insight. It always felt like the last three were not complete. Who was Darth Vader, what happened to him, why had he turned to the dark side.
As we sat and watched the movie together, the feelings it stirred up had quite an impact on me. I could totally see what happened to Anakin, I could even, in my own mind experience it. I have had things in this life that were so precious to me that I would do anything to keep them, anything. As Yoda said however, greed leads to fear, fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hate leads to the dark side of the force.
Anakin was so wrapped up in what he wanted, that he didn’t take the time to experience what he had. He was so consumed that it blinded him, and eventually, he himself caused what he was trying so hard to prevent – and then, he lost hope.
“But”, Donovan said to me, “It’s never too late to change”. Unfortunately, it’s much easier to see that from the outside looking in. However, Anakin took his path from innocence, to evil, and in the end, through acts of selflessness by someone else who cared enough for him to give up their own life; he was redeemed.
How much that touches on my heart, as I have experienced that; in fact, I experience that almost every day – it’s like a mini-journey. My children will too.
To often my heart can grow hard, and calloused, and there are things I want, and I’ll work for them at any cost, all the while neglecting those things that are most precious to me. And then, to gain those things most precious to me back, often takes more than I can muster in my own strength.
I am so thankful for the reminder that in the end, there is someone that is willing to help us, and with that help, we are then enabled to choose the good side of the force, to throw off the bondage of the dark side, and to seek redemption.
It was like watching a movie about my own life, just as my namesake – Darth Jedi – a precarious balance between the good side and the dark side. How Epic!
